December 29, 2001

What an appalling night (dream wise). These nights occur every so often - vivid dreaming and for the most part nightmarish.

I dreamt all night I was dying. Not dead; dying. In one, I was on a bus going off to someplace, like a hospital in another town, to die.

Then, in the real world, some asshole called at 3:12AM. Wrong number, presumably. But the phone woke me which, I suppose, wasn’t such a bad thing since the dream was none too pleasant. Dying generally isn’t (I imagine).

(Later, someone would call at 7:30 – this was a wrong number. I know because I answered. 7:30AM is better than 3:12AM but, in my world, these calls are wildly outside acceptable telephone time. 7:30 on a Saturday morning? What are they thinking?)

Anyway … Second dream, I’m dying again. All my family are there; we’re all still living together in one of the houses we had ages ago. My best friend from back then was in the dream too. Once again, there’s a bus I have to take to go away to die. Everyone is expecting me to get on it and never come back. But I don’t take the bus. I think, “Well, I’m going to die anyway … Why the rush?” So without telling anyone my plans, I simply “forget” to get on the bus, feeling guilty about it too, if you can believe it. And then the freakin’ phone rang. Again.

The question, of course, is, “Why dreams about dying?” Don’t know.

But if the feelings in the dream reflect my real feelings, death is not something I look forward to with any relish.

But why dream about it?

I have an additional torment today as well. I’ve got Walter Brennan’s voice in my head, God help me.

On another note entirely … It seems my rollovers don’t work on my blog. Or else I’m doing something wrong, which is entirely possible since HTML stuff is not my strong suit. It’s all gibberish to me. If you look at my page in IE (probably Netscape too) you’ll see the little note in the left corner, “Error on page!” As if it’s necessary to tell the whole damn world I’m a bonehead with no idea about what he’s doing.

Web thoughts:

1. There is no dignity on the Web.
2. If you’re an ass, the Web will reveal you as such.
3. On the Web, a fool and his incompetence are soon exposed!


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